SUBJ: Out Of The Mouths Of Babes
A daddy was listening to his child say his prayer "Dear Harold". At this, dad interrupted
and said, "Wait a minute, "How come you called God, "Harold"? The little boy looked up and
said, "That's what they call Him in church. You know the prayer we say, "Our Father, who art
in Heaven, Harold be Thy name."
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And this particular four-year-old prayed: "And forgive us our trash baskets as we forgive
those who put trash in our baskets."
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During the minister's prayer one Sunday, there was a loud whistle from one of the back pews.
Gary's mother was horrified. She pinched him into silence, and after church, asked: "Gary,
whatever made you do such a thing?" Gary answered soberly: "I asked God to teach me to whistle...
And He just then did!"
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One night Mike's parents overheard this prayer. "Now I lay me down to rest, and hope to pass
tomorrow's test, if I should die before I wake, that's one less test I have to take."
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A five-year-old said grace at family dinner one night. "Dear God, thank you for these pancakes."
When he concluded, his parents asked him why he thanked God for pancakes when they were having
chicken. He smiled and said, "I thought I'd see if He was paying attention tonight."
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A little boy's prayer. "Dear God, please take care of my daddy and my mommy and my sister
and my brother and my doggy and me. Oh, please take care of yourself, God. If anything happens
to you, we're gonna be in a big mess."
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A rabbi said to a precocious six-year-old boy: "So your mother says your prayers for you each
night? Very commendable. What does she say?" The little boy replied, "Thank God he's in bed!"
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A woman invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to her six-year-old daughter
and said, "Would you like to say the blessing?" I wouldn't know what to say," the little girl
replied. "Just say what you hear Mommy say, " the mother said. The little girl bowed her head
and said, "Dear Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?"
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Johnny had been misbehaving and was sent to his room. After a while he merged and informed
his mother that he had thought it over and then said a prayer. "Fine," said the pleased mother.
"If you ask God to help you not misbehave, He will help you." "Oh, I didn't ask Him to help
me not misbehave," said Johnny. "I asked Him to help you put up with me."
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A little boy was overheard praying: "Lord, if You can't make me a better boy, don't worry
about it. I'm having a real good time like I am!"
SUBJ: Kid's Letters To God
Dear God.....
Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones, why don't you just keep the ones
you have now?
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Who draws the lines around the countries?
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I went to this wedding and they kissed right in church. Is that okay?
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Thank you for my baby brother, but what I prayed for was a puppy.
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It rained for our whole vacation and is my father mad! He said some things about you that
people are not supposed to say, but I hope you will not hurt him anyway. Your friend (but I
am not going to tell you who I am)
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Please send me a pony. I never asked for anything before. You can look it up.
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If we come back as something, please don't let me be Jennifer Horton, because I hate her.
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I want to be just like my daddy when I get big, but not with so much hair all over.
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I think about you sometimes, even when I'm not praying.
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I bet it is very hard for you to love all the people in the world. There are only four people
in our family and I can never do it.
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Of all the people who worked for you, I like Noah and David the best.
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My brothers told me about being born, but it doesn't sound right. They are just kidding, aren't
they?
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If you watch me in church Sunday, I'll show you my new shoes.
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We read Thomas Edison made light. But in Sunday school, we learned that You did it. So I bet
he stole your idea.
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I do not think anybody could be a better God. Well, I just want you to know that I am not
just saying this because you are God already.
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I didn't think orange went with purple until I saw the sunset you made on Tuesday. That was
cool!
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Maybe Cain and Abel would not kill each other so much if they had their own rooms. It works
with my brother.
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